The BCS? How about the BSCS? I don’t have to translate that for you, do I? After last night’s debacle, I think it’s pretty clear. “Well, the BCS…err, BSCS isn’t a perfect system; it has some flaws,” its proponents might say. Oh really? Like what? I’ll tell you the one major flaw; it’s called the human element. Broadcasters have been saying for years (and it was said again after UCLA upset USC) the simple phrase, “well, that’s why we play the games.” That rings true for most sports, but not for college football. You see, in college football (Division I, that is, Division I-A, II, & III all have fully functional playoff systems) it’s different. We would rather have the blood, sweat, and tears of an entire season be decided by a computer and a panel of coaches that apparently can’t remember what happened past the current weekend than…well, a football game. What do I think should happen? I think the same thing that every sensible person would think. Why don’t we…and stay with me here because this is way outside the box…decide who the best football team is…this is so revolutionary that I almost don’t want to write it but here goes…by playing a game of football on a football field with football players playing football against each other with a football…on a field…with a football…on a field…playing football.(I will now pause to give you a chance to wipe your coffee or whatever beverage you had in your hand off of your screen and lap now)

However, since that last idea is a little too radical for the powers that be, let’s review our current selection process and where everyone blew it last night.

I think Michigan coach Loyd Carr sums it up best when saying, “*^$*&^**&&%&&%*$$^$*&%&$%$^&*&%$%$%$&%$ you $^*^@&%$, I’m going to kill all you ***&^&$^..^%,” oh wait, just kidding…that’s what I would have said if I were him. No, I think Loyd actually did say it best. “My statement is that I don’t think they would have moved ahead of us if USC had won their game,” Carr said of the Gators. “I don’t know what the voters were thinking…you’d have to ask them…but I don’t think there’s any question that if USC wins, we remain #3.” Done and done. I should be able to end this blog right now. There is no question that he is right on; there was no talk, and no possibility in anyone’s mind of Florida moving past Michigan in the polls if USC wins their game. No possibility whatsoever. The only question remaining was whether USC even deserved to be placed ahead of Michigan. After great deliberation, it was decided that USC’s 20 point win at home vs. Notre Dame was more awe inspiring than Michigan’s 26 point win against Notre Dame on the road, and USC’s loss to unranked Oregon State was not as damaging as Michigan’s 3 point loss to Ohio State at Ohio State. This is also all happening while Michigan, undisputedly, had a tougher schedule than USC. So, the question was never about Michigan vs. Florida; it was about Michigan vs. USC. How did Florida, then, jump ahead of Michigan in the polls? Other than that’s what the BSCS is best at (screwing people over, that is), I have a few (a few meaning ten) thoughts that I care to share on how they did and why they shouldn’t have.

(In no particular order…just writing as my rage leads me)

#1. In an extremely self-serving manner, Ohio State’s coach Jim Tressel decided not to cast his vote on who his team should play in the National Championship Game. Is this not obvious to anyone else but me? Tressel knew hands down that Michigan is a better team than Florida, but since he didn’t want to play Michigan again and didn’t want to dishonestly vote for Florida, he withdrew his vote. Ridiculous.

#2. Apparently this year, in addition to the already cumbersome BSCS formula, the committee has added another important criteria for the National Championship Game. “Rule# 1,000,997,001 states that there shall be no rematches under any circumstances.” This undoubtedly played a role in Michigan getting shafted last night, and this is a perfect example of the human element in the BSCS formula letting everyone down. Prior to the USC – UCLA game, all of the talking heads had no problem bolding stating that Michigan was at worst the 3rd best team in the nation behind USC (knowing full well that USC would win and thus there would be no rematch). However, when USC went down, all of a sudden Florida became the 2nd best team in the nation. How did this happen? You tell me. It’s almost like USC lost to Florida or something. Ludicrous.

#3. Michigan’s season simply ended too early. Remember after the Ohio State – Michigan game was over, (the game where Michigan was one questionable “helmet to helmet” call away from winning) the media was confidently stating that we had just watched the 2 best teams in the nation square off. In fact, Michigan didn’t even drop at all in the polls the next day. This was before the BSCS committee was struck with collective amnesia. Out of sight, out of mind. Unfortunate, but true. I’m telling you like a brother, if Michigan and Ohio State played their game this past Saturday instead of 3 weeks ago, Michigan would have gone into the game still #2, and like they did three weeks ago, they would have still come out #2 as well. Let me say this again…Michigan was still ranked #2 in the nation following their loss to OSU!!! Allow me to implore you. What changed since then? Was it USC’s win against a Notre Dame team that Michigan also slaughtered that did the trick, or was it Florida’s unimpressive wins against a 6 loss Florida State team or a 2 loss Arkansas team? Come on, tell me I’m crazy here! I don’t think so. Mind-boggling.

#4. Florida’s coach Urban Meyer said that Michigan had its shot against Ohio State. Well excuse me coach that Michigan’s 1 loss came to the best team in the nation. I guess it’s their fault for having them on their schedule. I guess we should have played and lost to a 3 loss team like Auburn; we would’ve gotten in then. Preposterous.

#5. Michigan and Florida both played Vanderbilt. Michigan won by 20 points, Florida won by 6. What am I missing here? Someone, anyone, help me…please! Astonishing.

#6. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, Aaron…I hear you, but Florida had a tougher schedule overall,” you might say. Let me address that with one statement directed to the SEC’s continual preaching of their conference’s parity. Parity does not always equal quality (just ask the ACC). However, while Florida’s schedule was ranked the #1 toughest in the country, they did only beat 3 top 25 teams all year. Michigan had the 3rd toughest schedule in the country, and Michigan State (another Big Ten team) had the 2nd toughest. There are now, according to the USA Today Coaches poll, three Big Ten Teams that will end the season in the top 5…TOP 5!!! Michigan played both of these teams. They also beat teams like Michigan State (big rival), Iowa (then ranked top 25), and Penn State (then ranked top 25 also) all on the road without their star receiver. Moreover, I don’t know how significant the difference between the 1st and 3rd toughest schedule is for the voters, but consider that Michigan steamrolled through their schedule with the only legitimate close game being a 7 point win at Penn State. Florida, on the other hand, had five wins 7 points or under and were a missed field goal away from losing to South Carolina. Plus, their loss to Auburn was by 10 points and at home, while Michigan’s loss was by 3 points and on the road (to a team infinitely better than Auburn, I might add as well). One more thing, if you’re one of those people who thinks Michigan shouldn’t get a shot because they didn’t win their conference…let me remind you of a little team called Ohio State. That’s right genius; they’re in the Big Ten and may have had something to do with it. Unbelievable.

#7. Picking Florida, in addition to the reasons above, was a good makeup call and a good bit of appeasement. Dick Bevetta and Neville Chamberlain (read your history) have got nothing on the BSCS. In the minds of many SEC faithful, Auburn got screwed over by the BSCS in 2004. Whether they did or didn’t I’m not going to debate. What I will debate, though, is what that has to do with our present day situation. The SEC has literally been whining like a snot-nosed brat for 2 years now about that, and it seems that the BSCS, fully aware that someone was going to get shafted this year, didn’t want to disappoint the SEC again. Communists…oh, sorry…that one just slipped out. Plus, given the crybaby like demeanor of Urban Meyer, I think they took the easy road. Plus, it would have been hard to deny Mr. Abramoff…err, Meyer after all that lobbying. Apparently the squeaky wheel does get the oil. Incomprehensible.

#8. I heard it said that “the people” (that would be you and I) wouldn’t want to see a rematch. Thus, this decision was partly made based on TV ratings and…I’m getting to it…money, ah…there it is. First of all, the Ohio State – Michigan game on November 18th was one for the ages, and the ratings were off the chart. What would be different in the sequel? Plus, Michigan is the all-time winningest football team in history, so as far as I can tell, there are a few fans still left out there. Outrageous.

#9. Along the same lines, it’s been proclaimed that it’s unfair for Ohio State to have to play Michigan again. Why? Was it unfair for the Lakers to have to keep playing the Celtics in the 80′s when they kept winning the Eastern Conference? What happened to the statement “may the best team win?” If you take the word “best” out of it, it sorta loses its luster…at least to me…but I’m old fashioned. Absurd.

#10. Last but not least, I challenge you to find one person that voted for Florida that really believes that they would beat Michigan in a head-to-head matchup. MICHIGAN WOULD FLAT OUT ANNIHILATE THEM!!! The funny thing is that everyone knows this and no one is debating it. Why is Michigan not playing in the National Championship Game then? Am I off my rocker here? Can somebody throw me a bone? What in the *$..&^*%^% just happened last night? Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Like I said in so many words, (and I’m not trying to sound like Jackie Chiles here) the whole thing is completely ridiculous, ludicrous, mind-boggling, preposterous, astonishing, unbelievable, incomprehensible, outrageous, absurd, and stupid, stupid, stupid. That’s why, for the first time in my life, I’ll be cheering on Ohio State as they totally obliterate Florida simply because after Michigan handles USC in convincing fashion, I’ll be front and center in the “I told you so” line. That’s when the good folks with the BSCS will be wishing they could take it all back. Too bad we can’t go back in time…or can we? Just kidding about that last part, but I had you thinking I had a time machine for a second, didn’t I? Well, I don’t have one, but if I did have one, and if it was really big, and if I was Loyd Carr, I would throw it at anyone and everyone responsible for this travesty. Because this is one Championship Series that is, well…BS.