For those of you who missed it, Vice President Joe Biden was in Richmond, VA yesterday (which is where I live) talking about the economy. Now, this is a normal occurrence…the VP traveling around hyping up the President’s ideas…what’s surprising is that people keep showing up to hear him speak. Although, come to think of it, given the Funny Bone’s usual Thursday schedule, Biden may have been the funniest act in town. Consider this quote from Mr. Biden as he was selling the need for a second stimulus:

“We’re going to go bankrupt as a nation,” he said. “Well, people that I say that to say, ‘What are you talking about, you’re telling me we have to go spend money to keep from going bankrupt?’ The answer is yes, I’m telling you.”

Ummm…

What?!?!

Just so we’re on the same page here, in order to avoid bankrupting the country we need to bankrupt it by borrowing and spending more money? Got it. However, to be sure that I wasn’t missing anything, I did check to see if yesterday was Opposite Day. It wasn’t, but according to the Dora episode my kids were watching when I got home from work, it was Best Friend’s Day…which I guess is irrelevant, that is unless Best Friend’s Day requires the Vice President to say mind-numbingly moronic things about the economy. I doubt it. So, let’s talk about this a bit, shall we?

First of all, if you’ve read this blog before, you know my thoughts on the first stimulus.

Secondly, if Joe Biden wasn’t speaking (albeit in extremely inarticulate fashion) for the President and the heavily Democratic Congress, who have the power…at the moment at least…to do whatever they want (which is quickly resulting in the destruction of the America we know and love), that would have been…hands down…the funniest thing I’ve ever heard.

In fact, it’s such a gem, that it’s inspired me to invent a fun, new game. It’s called The Joe Biden Game! The rules are simple. One must merely take any Joe Biden remark, such as the one above, and then attempt to apply Joe’s logic from said remark to other every day situations. I’ll give you a few examples below.

For instance, if the best way to avoid bankruptcy is to spend more money, then logically:

- If you’re wet, you should pour water on your head to dry off.

- If you’re hungry, you should satisfy your hunger pangs by not eating.

- If you’re hot, you should put on a sweater to cool down.

- If you’re tired, you should recharge by avoiding sleep.

- If you’re sad, you should dwell on some painful memories.

- If your plants are dying, you should shield them from the sun.

- If your child is hurt, you should throw something at him.

- If your car is broken, you should slash the tires.

- If your dog is lost, you should tell no one.

- If you love America, you should vote to reelect Obama/Biden in 2012.

See, it’s simple and fun!

Feel free to play at home, and don’t forget to teach your kids how to play too. They’ll need to know as many easy, free games as possible going forward, since at this rate, they’re adulthood will be spent suffering the economic consequences of our political stupidity today.